Inspirational Birth Stories

A lot of first time mothers ask me, "What does labor feel like? Where can I find real birth stories?"

Well, here's one great compilation of stories by Sheri L. Menelli :
Journey Into Motherhood - Inspirational Stories of Natural Childbirth.

Sheri Menelli was a childbirth educator. She decided to invite moms who had recently had their babies to classes to describe their positive birth stories. Of course all the expectant moms found that very inspirational, but what she was surprised by was that those groups of clients had much lower rates of interventions than groups of clients who had not heard positive stories by other moms.

This was so striking that she decided to compile some inspirational stories so that moms everywhere can learn from each other's wisdom.

The book is filled with real life experiences that will touch your heart and makes a great gift for pregnant moms anywhere. Here's a quote from the book I like,

"My first sight of my son will never leave my memory. As I
write this, tears are welling up in my eyes. Only at that moment did
I really unconditionally love. I had never known the feeling in my
life. His beauty radiated within my husband’s heart and mine. His
first cry was like a psalm, and his scent was just as heavenly. He settled
quickly to my voice and looked at me with the most loving
stare, and then closed his eyes and rested peacefully. I would labor
and birth a million times over just to see my son for the first time
again. It was incredible! I have entered into a part of my life that
only the hearts of other mothers know, and it is unexplainable."

The book is available in hardcopy at
and now a free e-book is available. Here's a note from Sheri :

"Yes, it is true, I have a very special treat for you. I"m giving away the electronic copy of Journey into Motherhood: Inspirational Stories of Natural Birth.

I have planned to do this for years and so here it is.

I have had so many people ask me why I would give this book away. I have 2 reasons:
1. My dream was to make this book as popular as "What to Expect When You're Expecting" which isn't one of my favorite books as I see it usually get moms into a panic. So really, this is a different kind of What to Expect When You're Birthing because it is 47 real women telling their births stories (48 total stories).

2. I believe the stories in this book are so amazing that anyone reading it would want a physical copy to give to their friends and family who are expecting. I can say that they stories are amazing and not be bragging because I did not write the stories. I only chose them and had my editor clean them up with grammar and punctuation. They changed my birth (I gave birth a few months after the book was finally published). The stories left me empowered. I had the most unexpected of circumstances a very rare set of twins and extremely high risk (Ironic isn't it?) but I had an amazing birth because I felt empowered and I decided to take charge. I know I wouldn't have had that courage if I hadn't been able to draw from the experiences of the women in the book.

I have hundreds of books at my husband's office - I decided to cancel my distributor's contracts. So, if you are moved and would like 1, 5, 10 or even a case. Please feel free to contact me at 760-930-0913. They are only $5 each plus shipping.

They have been popular with several midwives, childbirth educators and doulas who give them out to their clients because they have seen the difference it makes at the birth. Thank you Gerri Ryan, Colleen Salazar, Kara Spencer, Dawn Thompson, Carol Yeh-Garner, Vivian Giles, Jenny West, Sheridan Ripley and Kerry Tuschhoff. (If I forgot you, let me know).

Please feel free to download this book of Journey into Motherhood and pass it on to other birth workers and expectant women.


Love and Light,

Sheri Menelli
Author of Journey into Motherhod
Director of The Birthing Business Institute
www.birthingbusiness.com
760-930-0913

PS - Feel free to post this link on your website or favorite newsgroups, etc. I really do want to get it out to as many people as possible to read the stories.

PSS - If you are on Facebook, please link to me. You can find me by searching for Sheri Menelli. You can also put in the book title and become a fan of the book. "

Hope you Enjoy the book!!!

More information about cesareans - avoiding it, or waiting till labor starts on it's own, and recovering faster

Here's a website that summarizes a few main points about cesarean recovery, as well as trying to avoid an unecessary cesarean, or waiting till labor starts to do the cesarean. Many cesareans are scheduled at 38 weeks gestation.

http://en.allexperts.com/q/Childbirth-3495/c-section-recovery.htm

The assumption is that the baby will be fully developed by then, and the doctor won't likely be caught off guard by having to do an operation for a woman who goes into labor before the scheduled time. Evidence shows that not all babies are fully developed by 38 weeks, and that waiting for labor to start before doing the cesarean lowers the risks of the operation to the baby. Even sheduling at 39 weeks has benefits over 38 weeks.

There are many ways parents can get involved in decision making even for high-risk births. Decide what's important to you and your family and discuss that with your caregivers.

Here's the excerpt from the website :

"Expert: Elayne Glantzberg - 12/21/2007

Question
Hi Elayne,
I will be having a c-section in June when I deliver my first child. I wanted to know if you had any recovery information and tips to make this post op easier? Thanks for any help you may offer!

AnswerMy first tip would be to do everything you can to avoid this primary c-section, including getting several second opinions. It is vanishingly rare for a woman to have a complication requiring cesarean delivery that would be detected this early in pregnancy. Even a complete placenta previa can often self-resolve by term.

My second tip would be to wait until you go into labor before having the c-section, if at all possible. Babies born by scheduled c-section, without labor, are 2-4 times more likely to support from respiratory problems requiring a stay in the NICU, and are 3 times more likely to die in the first month.

Going into the surgery, discuss with your doctor the possibility of a more gentle cesarean, one in which the uterus is not completely removed from the body. Sometimes some of the dissection of your internal organs can also be avoided or minimized, particularly if you are not undergoing an emergency c-section. This will help minimize your pain and your risk of internal adhesions later on.

After the surgery, do not be afraid to take your pain medication. Even if you are breastfeeding, your milk will not come in for at least 2 days, and possibly longer due to the shock of the surgery to your body. During this time, your baby will not get any significant drug amounts through your milk. You need to get out of bed and moving around as soon as possible, to speed up healing and prevent blood clots from forming.

Try to get back to eating and drinking normally as soon as possible. Your body needs the nutrition in order to heal itself. Most doctors prefer to wait until you pass gas before allowing you to eat again, since this indicates that your bowels have "woken up" from the shock of the surgery; however, for some women this can take up to 36 hours, and going that long without food is very bad for anybody recovering from surgery, let alone a new mother. Lobby for at least a liquid or soft diet to begin within hours of surgery.

Some kind of support on your incision will help you stay comfortable and mobile as your heal. Remember that this operation will involve slicing through your abdominal muscles, making everything from sitting up to rolling over to sitting down a nightmare. Some women wear a special post-operative belly binder in the hospital and after they return home, and you can discuss this possibility with your doctor. Another option is the new C-Panty, which provides a built-in silicone compression panel to support your incision and help speed healing.

However things go for you, good luck! "

Making cesareans gentler and more mom and baby-friendly

Here's some useful new information for women who will be having cesareans :


From http://www.guardian.co.uk/society/2005/dec/03/health.medicineandhealth

" Obstetrician, Professor Nick Fisk has pioneered this groundbreaking approach to surgical delivery called "skin-to-skin caesarean", or "walking the baby out" partly in response to the rising caesarean rate. "And while couples having normal deliveries have been given more and more opportunities to be fully involved in childbirth, very little has been done to see how we could make the experience more meaningful for those having caesareans."

As Fisk started to examine the conventions of surgical delivery, he was struck by how easily they could be challenged. Why, for example, did they need to be done so quickly, when slowing them down would give the parents more chance to participate in their child's delivery and might give the baby a gentler experience of coming into the world? Why, too, was it so important for the parents to be screened off from the mother's abdomen? And was it really essential for the baby to be whisked off for an immediate medical examination, rather than delivered into the arms of his mother?

"What I realised was that caesareans were done a certain way because they've always been done a certain way, but in fact they can be done differently - and in a way that parents love," says Fisk. Other doctors are sometimes shocked when they hear what he is doing. "They say, but surely you have to get the baby out fast so she can get oxygen straight away? And I say, when the baby is being born she's still attached to the umbilical cord and is still getting oxygen from the placenta. Caesarean birth can be gentle, just as vaginal birth can be gentle.

"Obstetricians are too hung up on getting from the point of incision to the birth of the baby as quickly as possible: that's been the benchmark of a skilled surgeon. But I'm challenging that because, from the baby's and from the parents' point of view, it's not very helpful.

" I've never known a baby born by my method to have problems - going straight onto the mother's chest helps regulate breathing."

Smith, who works closely with Fisk, says it's a hit with parents. "They feel more involved, which gives them a better start to family life. Breastfeeding is easier to establish, and you can see how much calmer the baby is."

Project In Uganda

WOW! I found this great project being done in Uganda by Canadians to provide birth kits, birth support, sustainable income generation, etc to women and girls there.

Question about managing small children and staying sane

Q.: For those of you who ARE or WERE stay at home moms?
I myself am a stay at home mom and I am having some trouble with my little ones. I have twins who are 2 1/2 and a 15 month old as well.
I have never dealt or been around children before having my own. Lately they have been so difficult, and so stressing (mainly the youngest) I feel I don't have enough time to teach them the things they need to know. We don't leave the house often, because its a huge chore. I know they need more socialization, more teaching, more playtime. Everything. I feel like I try soo hard and not alot comes out of it by the end of the day. I am stressed beyond belief trying to keep the house clean, look nice by the time my man comes home and make sure all of the kids needs are met.

My husband is getting in trouble at work because I keep calling him home, and he can't lose his job. I feel guilty that I can't do this alone. I feel like it's time to go back to school and then get a job, but honestly I'm scared. I feel extremely guilty right now, feeling like everything is my fault.

Can anyone give me some advice from the heart. I am very confused, and I just want to do right by my children. Please help.

Answer:

Omigod!
Most mums with one toddler can TOTALLY relate!!! But what I find surprising is that you have THREE toddlers, and you're still wondering why you can't get everything done and you're so stressed out! :>

There's a reason why they say it takes a village to raise a child.
You do need more social support.
Please don't feel guilty. No one in your situation can do it all. It's pretty much impossible.

Don't worry about their socialization, or play or education at this point. No. 1 -they're really young. All that stuff will sort itself out over time. and no. 2 - focus on the basics first.

There is so much social pressure to do so much for kids these days, but less real help in actually doing them.
People who manage well with their kids generally have family or a close community who share in taking care of the kids. Parents, parents-in-law, sisters, aunts, friends, other mums etc.

People who live far away from their families, and don't have close friends nearby, do have to find other resources in order to stay sane.
Connect with other mums, mum's groups, organisations that provide support to parents, get a babysitter etc etc. Let everyone know that you need some help with childcare or housekeeping while your kids are so young.

I cannot stress this enough - the most important person to take care of is YOU. A sane and supported mum will automatically be able to take care of her family well.
It is a myth that a mum and a dad can sufficiently be perfect parents to their kids, especially times 3 little kids. People are so quick to blame parents, and so slow to help.

But you do need to ASK for help, and expect it. Don't feel guilty for receiving it, because you really do need it right now, and when you're kids are older, you will be able to help other mums with young kids.

This period of time when they are so little and their needs are so great is really intense. Things will get easier as they get older, I promise you.
it will be easier a year from now, even more easy 2 years from now and so on.
Wait till then till you start trying to add more activities into their lives.

For now, you can set very low expectations. If your kids are fed and you are fed and have slept enough, and you haven't gone totally berserk all day (a little bit berserk is ok), then you can consider that a successful day.
If you manage to do a little tidying up, or take the kids out or whatever, then that's a bonus! Give yourself a big treat for managing that.

There was a time when my kids were young and I thought I had to be doing all sorts of amazing things with them, and be a happy mum who never lost her temper, and have a beautifully kept house, and cook delicious yet healthy meals....
Meanwhile, I didn't have time to even breathe, I was grumpy and guilty and wound up all the time, fighting with my husband etc etc.
I thought it was just I who was incompetent.

Eventually, I found out that most mums felt the same way, especially those without social a social network where they lived.

Now, my priorities are
1. Do several things throughout the day to feel relaxed and content. eg. Get enough sleep. Sit for a few minutes without the kids and have a drink or something. Tell your kids you are having some "mummy alone time". They'll eventually get used to it. Destress in the bath. Set aside some telephone or email time for yourself to talk to your friends and complain. :> Join a gym that has childcare. Get some adult time.

2. Spending time with your husband minus the kids is important.
Try to get a babysitter (or two), leave the mess in the house and go have some fun. Aim to do that once a week. More realistically, if you manage once a month, that's great! Appreciate yourselves and each other for the amazing job you are doing of raising 3 human beings.

3. Find a system of discipline that works for you and your kids. Well-behaved kids are easier to look after. You do not need to entertain your kids. The good thing about having three is that they will entertain themselves if left to their own devices. Especially as they get older.

4. As for the house, focus on the most important things and ignore everything else for the next couple of years. The kitchen is pretty important. Having clean laundry too.
Get big storage bins and throw everything in to get it out of sight - bins for unfolded laundry , toys, the mess in your living room when people are coming over etc etc.
Declutter and throw away or give away what you don't need or use.
Have a talk with your husband. Tell him how you feel about the housework. Let him know that you appreciate anything he does to help. If you can afford it, consider getting housecleaning services. Discuss lowering your standards of tidiness for the next one to two years.

Above all, whatever you do with your kids, it needs to work for you.
You and your husband need to be the centre of your family not your kids. Because if you're stressed out you can't take care of your kids as well as when you feel centred and in control.

Birth Quotes

Birth is not only about making babies. Birth is about making mothers ~ strong, competent, capable mothers who trust themselves and know their inner strength. Barbara Katz Rothman


The moment a child is born, the mother is also born. She never existed before. The woman existed, but the mother, never. A mother is something absolutely new." Rajneesh

The genius of her body is designed to give birth with ease and grace. In our soft warm hands, we are holding the keys to the future. Elena Tonetti- Vladimirova

It seems that many health professionals involved in antenatal care have not realized that one of their role should be to protect the emotional state of pregnant women. Michel Odent, MD

We have a secret in our culture, and it's not that birth is painful. It's that women are strong. Laura Stavoe Harm

Making the decision to have a child is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body." Elizabeth Stone

Before you were conceived, I wanted you
Before you were born, I loved you
Before you were here an hour,
I would die for you
This is the miracle of love. Maureen Hawkins

Childbirth classes neglect to teach one critical skill: How to breathe, count, and swear all at the same time. Linda Filterman

Before I was married I had six theories about raising children. Now I have six children and no theories. John Wilmot, earl of Rochester

They say men can never experience the pain of childbirth. They can...if you hit them in the goolies with a cricketbat for fourteen hours. Jo Brand

Question about breastfeeding

Q. What is the normal duration for a woman to have breast milk?
How long does the milk usually last? How many months is the average/normal duration?


A. The milk will last until the child stops breastfeeding. The baby's sucking is what stimulates the mum to produce more breastmilk. The more baby breastfeeds, the more milk mum produces, for as long as the child goes on breastfeeding. There is no normal time for breastfeeding. Some mums don't breastfeed at all, some breastfeed a few weeks, a few months, or a few years. In some countries, mums breastfeed for many years. Children do need milk for the first few years of their lives, whether that is cow's milk, soy milk, or human milk. Breastfeeding past one year is usually not practised in today's culture, but it is possible and probably beneficial.